I realize that a lot of people find pregnancy to be awkward or uncomfortable or ugly. I understand now how those feelings could come into someone's mind, but that is absolutely not how I feel about this whole process.
I've always wanted to be pregnant. I've always thought that it looks somewhat glamorous. I've always thought that pregnant women of all shapes and sizes are absolutely, 100%, the most beautiful women on the planet. I was hoping that I would feel this way about myself when I became pregnant, and I am happy to report that I DO!
I haven't struggled with self esteem or self consciousness since I got braces. The only thing that ever bothered me about my appearance enough to make me shy or nervous to speak to others was the gap between my teeth. After that, I've been pretty happy. Sure there were times where I didn't like the way clothes fit, or how my stomach looked in that swimsuit, or the haircut that I had, but I still went out and lived my life. Whatevs. I've been really skinny and I've gained a lot of weight really quickly. Your friends shouldn't be your friends based on how you look. Am I right? Recently (within the past 2-3 years) I've really struggled with some stomach and bloating issues. I really hated it. I couldn't wear a fitted shirt or dress because I knew that I would have some super bloatage by the end of the day. This shaped my love for Piko's…bless those flowy miracles. I found some (at least I thought so) great alternatives for my wardrobe to accommodate my gas bubble - as I so lovingly called it.
Well, now I'm pregnant. Getting bigger in the stomach is part of the process. I. LOVE. IT. I love the way I look and feel so far in this pregnancy. I love that I can wear tight shirts and not feel self conscious of the stomach sticking way out in front of me. I love maternity pants and I don't think I will ever give those things up. I love that I am at the stage now where pretty much anyone that sees me knows that I am with child. I love that I haven't gained a lot of weight and it seems that most of the weight gained is in the belly region. I love that I'm pregnant in the summer because I love being tan. I've come to find out that tan and pregnant is my happy place. (Ohmygosh…how vain did that sound!?!?!) I have never been more comfortable in my own skin as I am right now.
I know that my thoughts on all of this could still change as I have 17 weeks and 6 days to go with this whole thing. I wanted to document how I am feeling right now. I also know that not everyone feels this way about being pregnant and that's ok! I am so very thankful, and have said this to Andrew recently, that I love being pregnant as much as I hoped and thought I would. This is a total blessing and I refuse to complain or take it for granted.
15 weeks
19 weeks
Almost 22 weeks
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